Tag: Multiple Sclerosis

FREE SOS feature on your phone

~ msgracefulnot ~ 20 Comments

Recently, I had to start doing research on devices that would allow the user to activate a panic or sos button that would notify friends or family that they needed assistance.  While I still have not found the exact device to suit my needs, I did stumble across some very useful information about a FREE feature included on ALL cell phones  regardless of model or provider, without having to download an app or pay for a service.

If you are interested in hearing more, please keep reading!!!

Let me start by telling you what this feature does, or how it works after you do an initial setup and then I will post screenshots on how I set it up on my phone.

Once you have completed the initial setup, if you need to send an SOS message, you simply click your power button 3 times quickly.  Doing so,  enables the front and back cameras on your phone to take a picture.  It also makes a 5 second audio recording, and sends all of this information including your GPS coordinates to a pre-selected contact.

Too good to be true?  I thought so too.  So of course I had to test it out numerous times to try to find a flaw.  I’m happy to say that I couldn’t find any.

Each time I tested this, either myself or my contact received the message within 30 seconds.  The camera does not use the flash, so their is no indication to an outside party that you have clicked an alert.  The GPS coordinates were accurate to within 200 feet.

The steps I used to set this up on my phone are as follows:

  1. Go under your settings tab
  2. scroll down to privacy and emergency
  3. turn on send sos messages
  4. select a contact
  5. on the final screen you have the option to attach pictures and/or audio

From what I can tell, this feature is available on all makes of phones regardless of your service provider.  While each person I have talked to about this, has been able to set this up on their phone, FOR FREE, the steps were slightly different than the ones I used.  If you are interested, Google… ” how to set up sos messaging on your phone”.

Let me know if you tried this, and any opinions or concerns you might have that I might not have thought of.  I am very curious to know if it also works in other countries besides the US.

Great reminder from Walk a Myelin* My Shoes

~ msgracefulnot ~ 24 Comments

Earlier today I read a post that reminded me of a topic I had wanted to discuss many times, but had never gotten around to.  Amanda, at Walk a Myelin* My Shoes wrote this post today, that I think everyone who has to ask someone for help, myself included, should remember.   BE Kind and Thankful for the people that are there for you.  But not only that…. REMEMBER to THANK them.

I reblogged this on my page a few minutes ago, in an effort to share her post, but I don’t know if I did it correctly.  If you have a minute, please take a minute to visit her post on her page at the link above.

We’ve all held the door for someone without receiving thanks.  Maybe you have let someone with a smaller cart checkout in front of you?  Doing those things and helping people for the most part makes us feel good about ourselves, when it is our choice to do them, and it’s an added bonus when the person you help Thanks you.

I’d like to share a story that while I am not ashamed of, I am not particularly proud of.  I’m not going to go back and “fix, or undo” it, but I do try to be better than that now, and I really try to remember to thank the people I have to ask for help.

Ok so here’s the story….

When Thing One and her husband started dating, he lived in Michigan and she lived in Il.  I am so thankful that the kids have decided to make Illinois their home.  I felt bad for Z’s mother, who has several physical limitations, that she would not be able to see the kids as easily.  Once the kids decided to get married, Z’s mom, (we’ll call her T) decided that she wanted to move to Illinois to be closer to our kids and potential grandchildren.  She asked for my help.

I have learned the hard way in the past, (and I am still learning) that it’s important to set boundaries when you help someone.  One boundary I try to place is that I will happily TEACH you how to do anything I can, but I won’t do things FOR you, if you are capable of doing them yourself and chose not to.

I helped T find maps, handicap accessible apartment websites and phone numbers, and offered to take her to the buildings if she did all the other prep work of reviewing the websites, and scheduling appointments.  That process wasn’t without it’s issues, but we did it.  She came to Illinois to stay with the kids for 4 days, and Friday was the day I would show her around and take her to her appointments.

When I arrived at Thing One’s to pick T up, they (Thing one and T) weren’t quite ready and neither had eaten breakfast, so I offered to make eggs for them both.  I asked, T how she wanted her eggs,  ( which is more than I did for Thing One) and she replied “Over medium”.  Ok, I will give it my best shot.  I made her eggs first, and when I placed them in front of her she made a face and said, “I guess I can work with that”.

Deep breath Grace!…Deep Breath! ( no I did not throw the plate in her lap)…..  I did look at Thing One though, who instantly gave me an apologetic look.  ( l love that my kiddo and I can communicate through facial expressions and body language so well)  Next I made Thing One’s eggs and placed them in front of her.  She replied, “Thank you.”  (Yes I had to point out that my daughter has simple manners).  Finally, I finished my own eggs.  (the same way I made T’s) eggs.  I sat down to eat and T immediately said, ” well that’s how I wanted my eggs, that looks good.”

WOULD YOU LIKE MY FUCKING EGGS?!?!?!?

What I actually said was,  “If you would like my plate, I will happily trade you.”  She dismissed me and began to eat from her own plate.

Several times throughout the day she barked at me that I was doing something wrong, or this wasn’t what she wanted.  I really really tried to be patient, but after seeing 4 different apartment buildings, and constantly being told I was incorrect, I made up an excuse that I needed to be home for Einstein for something, and took them back to Thing One’s.  (sorry kiddo, I did what I could….but she’s all yours)  and yes I did say that in her ear as I hugged her goodbye.

For the remainder of the evening I tried to offer Thing One appropriate responses to her future mother in law  (via text ) as she got on Thing One’s nerves more and more.  I was also supposed to hang out with the kids and T on Saturday for a couple hours.

When I got there on Saturday, I told both of the kids I was only staying for one cup of coffee, and asked which excuse they would like me to give about why I wasn’t staying longer.  Since the kids were “entertaining”, I offered to make everyone coffee.  Thing One wanted hers with creamer, no problem.  Z wanted his with a scoop of sugar, also no problem. I don’t even remember what T wanted in her’s because I honestly I had had ENOUGH of being told how many things I did wrong…

Here comes the not proud part

I placed T’s cup in front of Z and told him, “Here, YOU fix her coffee for her, because if  she tells me I did ONE MORE thing wrong, she will wear it”.  T gasped and looked up at me saying, ” Oh do you mean about yesterday?…. I was only joking!!!!”

Uh huh.  I quickly drank my coffee, made my excuse to leave, and wished T an enjoyable rest of her trip.

Yes I know that was wrong and very passive aggressive of me.  As I said I’m not proud.  But I think it illustrates my point.

A year has passed since that day, and while I have not been MEAN to Z’s Mom, I have not been helpful in ANY WAY.  Normally I would have spent some time at the kids wedding in March with her, making sure she was settled in ok etc.  I didn’t, other than to make sure the obligatory newlywed’s with their mom’s picture was taken.  I have not shared any of the kid’s ultrasound pictures with her (as I would have in the past).  I know that it’s not my job to do those things, but that is who I normally am.  The one who tries to treat everyone like they would like to be treated.

I’m sure I will have more dealings with T in the future, and any help I give will be because I chose to help not expecting anything (even a thank you in return) I know that this is the way it is supposed to be, but I am human, and would at least like a Thank you.

Thank you for reading along today.  Do you get bent out of shape too, when a Thank you is not spoken? I think we all do a bit.  PLEASE remember to thank people who are kind to you, or that you rely on for help, it can really make a huge difference.

**** I didn’t realize until reading some of your comments, that I neglected to add that at this time, T still resides in Michigan.

Pushing my buttons…. battle of the sexes

~ msgracefulnot ~ 27 Comments

OMG, I don’t even know where to start!!!!!!  Have you ever had a “battle, argument, disagreement or whatever” with someone that started as a somewhat serious issue, but just turned into the most laughable, ignorant thing ever.   I am having so much trouble finding the words…… but Einstein has done it again…...DAMN BUTTON PUSHER!!!!

Ok So here’s the thing…. I am very very organized and have OCD about the cleanliness of my house….. most importantly things NOT being left on the floor.  I can, and frequently do, trip on air, and have broken many bones from falling etc.  ( to be honest though, I have probably always been OCD)  Either way, I hate things on the floor!!!!!

Einstein has an issue with ….you guessed it leaving things on the floor….most notably his laundry.  I have two hampers set up in our bedroom, the black one for his work clothes and the white one for everything else.  They are both right outside the bathroom, with absolutely no obstacles in their way.  So why can’t he hit the fucking thing?!??!!  There is not just one but TWO of them!!!!!  20180107_125708

Silly me thinking maybe he hadn’t been taught how to use a hamper in his lifetime, even made signs for the hampers.  I gave him a two minute instructional lecture on how to take off dirty clothes and place them in the hamper.  I have attempted to show him how easy it is to drop wet towels from his shower right into the basket.  NOTHING WORKS!!!!  Einstein is not ignorant in away way.  If nothing else, the fact that he is so successful at work, proves this.  SO Why the hell can’t he hit the hamper?!?!?

Ok, we are getting older, maybe his eyesight is starting to fail.  Maybe the fact that he has too many choices is overwhelming for him.  So I took ONE HAMPER and put it RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR BEDROOM thinking “he can’t miss this”….  I come home to this…..

laundry goes inside the hamper
Laundry goes INSIDE the hamper

are you fricking kidding me?!?!??!  He took the time to lay his pants on one side, his tshirts on another and so on and so on.  ( I staged this picture, because I can’t find the original one from maybe 3 years ago)…. Yes 3 years ago!!!!  We are still having this battle!!!!!

I have tried not washing his clothes if he doesn’t hit the hamper.  ( apparently the smells from the chemicals he gets on his clothing bother me more than him though)  I have tried hamper relocation, purchasing multiple hampers etc. and am now at my wits end.  Last week after actually falling on his clothes,  I “snapped”.  I took blue painters tape, and outlined the “common areas” of our bedroom.  I told him, “If you insist on leaving your clothes on the floor, do it outside of the COMMON AREAS.  The common area is now outlined to help make this clear for you.”…… The tape is making him nuts, but he still can’t hit the hamper.  (to be honest it is kind of making me nuts too, but I really don’t know what else to do)… a bit of passive aggressiveness here….  This is what the bedroom floor looks like this morning……..20180107_125613

So now I guess I wait?   I told him that I was going to make a blog post about this.  Maybe he thinks no one will read it.  Maybe he thinks everyone will just think I am crazy?  I don’t know, but there it is….Evidence to be used against me for when I finally lose it?  To all the woman out there…… help?

….to all the guys……. Is this a guy thing?

to all the doctors (psychiatrists) ……..why does he push my buttons

and more importantly why do I let him?!?!??!

This blog is MEANT to be funny.  I can’t very well dispose of his body now that I have shared this story with the world, (and I have removed the “body” I outlined on the floor in tape) but maybe I can Push his buttons a bit, by showing him that I did indeed make a blog about this and people actually read it?  Please like this, comment, share etc.  at the very least smile and know that there is someone out there more messed up than you 😛

 

 

Trying to find “Joy” (inside joke)

~ msgracefulnot ~ 7 Comments

We have a 10 year plus old whirlpool tub that has a “hand held jet” to help you reach the spots you can’t position yourself in front of to feel the pulse.  Anyway the massaging part popped off, and Einstein won’t let me glue it back on, BUT he said I could buy a replacement for his tub,….. if I could find one.

That was my agenda for the day.  (Oh and a test video chat with zoom today at 12:30 p.m.) Thankfully, I had the company of an awesome friend to accompany me along on my errands.  To keep her identity personal we will call her “Joy” for the time being. So my friend “Joy” showed up (a little late as usual), but that’s ok, because I already new it was going to be a multi store experience and company was good…. NOTHING IS EVER SIMPLE!!!

We left for the mall a little before 9.  Who knew they didn’t open until 10?  😦  That’s ok, we could walk the mall to fit in my mile walk today.  We did!… It was actually kind of relaxing until a 90 year old man flew by us without so much as a hair out of place.  Yes I instantly felt 100 years old.  Can you be going through menopause at 44?... I just snarled at him (under my breath) and kept plugging and sweating along.

Finally 10 o’clock rolled around, and Sears opened.  I’m thinking Sears has everything, they will be able to help (when I was a kid, you always called Sears).  We had to walk through the entire store before we were finally directed to the “expert”. ( Over 13 hills, through mountains and a river even)  But the “expert” was no expert.  I will share his name though.  It is Don.  Don the NON expert.  But that’s okay….. Don had an expert to send us to.  ON THE OTHER SIDE OF TOWN ( you know the part that you never go into after dark, let alone daylight?  YEP THAT PART OF TOWN)

“Joy” decided that she was up for the adventure so we headed out to find the new god of hand held spa jets.….Let me just say…it was a complete and utter DEAD END.  They didn’t carry parts for “bathtub type whirlpools”  at least I think that’s what they said.  Either way no help and no redirection…. Oh well tomorrow’s a new day and I still have to stock up at Sam’s club before my membership expires next month.  (honestly I had to pee and didn’t feel comfortable dropping my pants there)

“Joy” and I quickly (but of course safely, following all appropriate speed limit laws, etc) headed out the door and back to the first side of town.  YAH!…Sam’s club was simple.  Einstein had given me his credit card to pick up $200.00 in alcohol (for the imaginary new year’s party that we are FINALLY going to have).  I ran into some dear friends that I went to high school with, did the FAST “tell me all about your life in under 15 minutes”, add me on Facebook ( oh shit I have a new one), and let’s get together after the holidays thing.  FTR I really hope this happens!!!  I spent $193.18 and even got some granola and bananas in the process.  YAH under budget!!!! AND most importantly I made it to the bathroom in time….BONUS YAH!!!

I had run out of coffee at this point so I offered to buy “Joy” lunch for letting me DRAG her along.  She “milked” my guilt, and said that she wanted to go to a very expensive hibachi grill in the area, I thought about it for about 1/2 a second ( I did have Einstein’s credit card), and then took her to McDonald’s.  On the way back to my house, I did pull in the parking lot of the famous hibachi grill so she could eat her lunch there.  So I did try….

Clock check…. holy shit it’s 12:00, MAYBE we could pop in Great Escape very quickly to see if they could help us.  (It takes me 4 hours to walk a mile though remember?), but we could try…. besides I had to pee AGAIN, so off we went.  As I did the “I HAVE TO FRICKING PEE NOW” potty dance I tossed the bag to the guys behind the counter… (Maybe I even threw it?)…no no I’m sure I tossed it gently as I nearly screamed, “I have to pee, can you look at that, and where’s the BATHROOM?!?!?!?”

I won’t bore you with those details, but yah mission accomplished….( well the making it to the bathroom part.)  When we went back to the counter 4 guys were standing there just kind of staring at us.  ( probably still in shock at my entrance), but they hadn’t even looked in the bag.  When I asked if they could help us, they said, “Well what is it?”  OMG are you fricking kidding me?!?!?  Seriously hasn’t anyone seen a handheld whirlpool tub jet?!?!? (I posted the picture above if you haven’t)  Feeling my frustration, my friend “Joy” blurted out, “IT’S A VIBRATOR”.  Well THAT got their attention.  No help from them, but definitely their attention….and then we were out of time.

I raced ( again very safely, following all posted speed limits) home with 5 minutes to spare for my video call.  (Crap did I shower this morning?!?!?) No matter, it was happening anyway.

12:30pm.  ZOOM is awesome!  Similar to skype but I think more advanced.  My call was with a fellow blogger offering advice on setting up your blog for monetizing and increasing traffic to your site. (I’m not ready for that at this point, but maybe sometime in the future)  Either way she was very helpful and knowledge, and we had a great “chat”.  I’m waiting for her to let me know if I can use her link in my post, so I will add it tomorrow if she allows me too. (damn time difference and personal lives)  She is very helpful and has set up a fb group on blogging too.  UPDATE… I talked to her, and she said “cool”  so here is her link, if you want to join the group or connect.  Sophie is awesome!   Bloggers going pro facebook group .

As for my hand held whirlpool tub jet, I am at a dead end for the night.  I have no model or serial number, just a broken jet.  BUT, I had a fantastic, and somewhat productive day!! “Joy” listened to me whine about my empty nest syndrome, and every other adhd topic that came to mind….maybe I do owe her a REAL “very expensive hibachi grill in the area” for lunch after all ?!?!  Maybe a dinner too?

If I didn’t bore you, or put you to sleep and you are still reading….THANK YOU!!!  I needed this kind of day with this kind of friend ( the one who you aren’t sure who is the bad influence) to remind me that I am more than a mother, more than ms, and it’s ok to have some down days.  (ty to those that commented on my post the other night)

Okay no cliche’s tonight.  Have a wonderful evening everyone! I hope I didn’t “overshare”.  ( I am working on a “disclaimer” for the website, but I don’t think “I have no filter” is enough)  In fact, since the 4th person has recommended that I made a video or video blog, I am thinking of giving that a try in the upcoming weeks… so much to learn…..