STOP PUSHING ME!!!!

When I first started writing this, I was going to call it “Big Brother get the hell out of my mouth”, but then I worried that people would be offended thinking that I was making a joke about incest.  This is NOT a post about incest, nor do I think incest is a joking matter!  It is however the post in which I finally show my ass, because I am tired of having technology SHOVED down my throat.

I should probably start at the beginning.

It’s time for my six month check up at the dentist.  (well it was time 2 months ago, but technology has made something as simple as getting my teeth cleaned a fricking nightmare)

For the past several years, I have seen the same dentist, same office, same staff, same same same.  Great!  This year though, two weeks before my appointment, the office staff called to say, they no longer accept my insurance, would I like to pay out of pocket or pick a new dentist?…..Seriously?!?!?  Did you just decide this?  Maybe a little bit of notice? and to be honest, I would like to hit you in the head with a dental tool if that’s an option.

Oh Grace, “we sent you an email in January letting you know that these changes were taking place.”

You mean you sent an email to the address Iamgivingyouthisbecauseyouaremakingmebutiwillnevercheckit@gmail.com ?!?!?

Hmm I will get right with you on checking that.  And it never occurred to you to try picking up the god damn phone to call me?… WHATEVER! apparently our relationship is over.

I called my insurance company to find out where I had to go.  Went through the push this for that and that for this game, only to be told I had to visit their website to pick a dentist.  That process alone took a month, but that is a whole different rant.  Finally, I made an appointment at this new dentist.  I am still smh at the last question the receptionist asked me before I hung up….”Is there anything we can do to make your visit more comfortable?”  …………..Like what?….. I responded, “yes, please be on time”….they weren’t.

I showed up for my appointment at 8 am, they finally called me at 8:30.  (The reason they were late is because the tv in the lobby wasn’t working)  ok?  smh…  I sat through new xrays, gum poking, etc, and and hour later was advised that because some of my gums were swollen I should have this procedure done which would go underneath my gumline for a more through cleaning.  Don’t worry though it will only cost you $465.00 (because you have insurance)…oh and here is a free new toothbrush for you.

Oral B Genius

FREE MY ASS!…. How about you keep the damn toothbrush and take $100.00 off my bill?

Oh But Grace, this is a SMART toothbrush, you just snyc it with your smart phone and it will help ensure that you are brushing in each quadrant of your mouth for the recommended amount of time, and you can also upload your records to your hygienist……Don’t believe me?  click the link ^^^^^^

to me this translates as….

Once you have given us permission to access your contacts etc we will spam the hell out of them trying to sell them a toothbrush as well.   We will work with facebook to be sure to include these ads on all of your friends pages too.

I am a smoker, and a massive coffee drinker.  I brush my teeth multiple times a day, for more than the recommended two minutes.  I don’t NEED anything to make me more comfortable in your chair.  I need you to clean my teeth!  I need you to be on time, or at least something close to it.

SMH….

Of course, they couldn’t clean my teeth THAT day, they had to make another appointment.  Fine appointment made, be back in a week.

Oh I came back in a week alright…to be told that because I didn’t confirm my appointment via email, they had to cancel….. and yes I did give them the same email Iamgivingyouthisbecauseyouaremakingmebutiwillnevercheckit@gmail.com.

My appointment has now been rescheduled for next week.  I walked out of the office and right back in telling them I would like to confirm my appointment.

About a week ago, my smart phone quit working and I have been patiently waiting for a replacement to be sent. (I am pretty sure the 200 texts I got from their office have something to do with the breaking of my phone)

I hope that next week, after my teeth are cleaned, all of this “shitty talk” will stop flowing out of my mouth.

In all seriousness though, I am not saying that technology itself is a bad thing.  I am saying that I want people to realize that nothing in life is free, and you might be giving up more control than your realize if you depend on it.

Full Disclosure!!!!!  Msgracefulnot.com is a participant in the Amazon Services Associates Program.  Amazon offers a small commission on products sold through their affiliate links at no additional costs to you.

Help! I don’t know how to be a “GIRL”

Ok, Ok, you all know that I have the X chromosomes… (there are two right?)

I was born a female.  I have not had any surgeries or anything like that to change that fact, nor do I want to.  (well except for this one time, when I had a hysterectomy... medically necessary NOT elective) But I am struggling with how a “girl” is supposed to look, act, dress etc.  You see, I’ve never actually TRIED to “fit in”,  BUT now…

Thing ONE is getting Married in March!!!

I am THE MOTHER OF THE BRIDE…. who knew that was such a thing?  I mean I know I’m her mother, but I apparently don’t just get to sit there and watch my kiddo get married,  I actually have to SHOW UP, (like dress up and say stuff and…..whoa)….

When she was a little girl and it was just the two of us, I envisioned being the one to walk her down the aisle, and that’s as far as it ever went.  I never thought about “giving her away” or her father walking her down the aisle.  I am glad that Einstein is doing that part, since I don’t think I could say the words when asked, “who gives this woman?”

DRESSing up to SHOW UP

I guess it makes sense that the first part for me then is choosing a Dress, since I was informed that I can NOT wear sweats and a Tshirt.  I was also TOLD that I could not wear a Tuxedo as I have in 2 previous weddings.  DON’T JUDGE!!! (I had “stereotypical male roles” as an Usher in one, and a Best Man in the other, so it was fitting, AND cheaper.) 😛

Picking out a mother of the Bride Dress

Thing 1 and her bridesmaids told me I was not allowed to wear a tent, or an old matronly type dress either, because I am not OLD….. well THAT got my attention….DO TELL!!!!  So I agreed to wear a dress if they helped me pick one.  We went to David’s Bridal and the fitting person asked me what kind of a dress I would like….um….well…. um… I repeated the bridesmaids directives and added a few of my own:

  1. The dress could NOT be matronly
  2. It had to be the Color Plum (to compliment the bridal party)
  3. The dress had to be long so I could “hide my bag of pee” if I needed it that day (and to hide my tennis shoes, if I could get away with wearing those)
  4. I get hot very easily, so no long sleeves

The “fitter person” took my measurements, suggested a size, and the bridesmaids all took off running to find the “perfect dress”.  SO Many dresses…..smh  I was exhausted by the time I had tried them all on, so I told them to vote and pick one.  They did.  (and I spent a boat load of money on a dress)

Time for shoes!

My kiddo, told me I could wear my tennis shoes under my dress because they are custom fit with orthotics to keep me upright…so for the most part that is covered. ( I do own a nice pair of black flats for pictures so that part is covered too)…. I think I’m good to go…..but

What about your Hair and Make up?

Yes I have hair, no I don’t own makeup.  Next?……(apparently it is not that simple)

Hiring someone to do your hair and makeup for a wedding

My daughter presented me with 3 options for having my hair and make- up done.  I am pretty sure she doesn’t really care how I show up as long as I show up, but she wanted me to feel included.  She told me there are 3 packages available for make up (hair is included)

  1. Regular make up
  2. Airbrush makeup
  3. “24 hour” makeup.

I honestly don’t know what any of that means and all would be a change for me, but ok here goes.  So, I called the place that she hired to do everyone’s hair and make up and asked them if they have something like SHELLAC that they could apply over whatever they decide to do to my face….they laughedI WAS SERIOUS!!!

I expect to bawl like a baby, not bad tears, but happy ones, but lots of tears nonetheless.  And I am a horrible crier…

making crying beautifulI look NOTHING like Jennifer Love Hewitt in Ghost Whisper who looks more beautiful with each tear she sheds.

So please just make it water/tear proof.

 

I even enlisted Tiara from DGGYST to ask for make up tips.  (she really is kind, even in real life…not just “celebrity mode”) and she didn’t laugh at me when I asked for help.

Choosing Bridal Jewelry

Now I am stuck on Jewelry/accessories.  How the hell do you chose those?  Do they have to be the color of the dress, or do you pick something for the style of the dress?  Since I don’t really own any jewelry, I suppose I should buy something that I can wear again.  (like maybe when thing 2 gets married)

I do have pierced ears, but only because the holes never closed from when I was 12 and pierced my own ears to shock my parents.  So I was thinking maybe matching earrings and a necklace?…I am really stuck though.

I am afraid to ask anyone I know in real life to go shopping with me, for fear that they will try to talk me into a full wardrobe makeover….and then our friendship would have to end….and well let’s just say it’s better that I don’t ask them.

So here I am asking for help.  Any advice on how to Choose jewelry?  I would like to draw attention AWAY from my port.  (I know I am very self critical, I am working on that.)  I am excited about the Wedding, and I am getting excited about dressing up, it’s just been so long since I have, that I have forgotten “how to be a girl”.

 

 

 

Is it possible to “go off the grid”?

Let me start by saying that I am not a political person.  This is not a post about civil rights etc.  I am however A THINKER (referred to as OVER thinker by most).  This morning’s overthinking began when I signed into youtube.com to hear I song that was on my mind.  I have to give you a few more details before I get to the point, because I don’t want to cause you to overthink my reason for listening to the song.

Many of you know, but for those of you that don’t, the last couple weeks have been a bit stressful for me.  The most obvious stressor  being Sarah’s death, and because of that other things have been carrying more weight on my shoulders than they should.

  1. Einstein has not fixed his car yet, so he has been relying on me, to either get up at the butt crack of dawn and take him to work, and then go again in the afternoon and pick him up OR surrender my car for him to use.  Most days I have given up the car.  This starts the “butterfly effect” or chain reaction.  I have to move all of my doctor appointments to the following week, do all of my shopping online etc etc.  So next week will be busy as hell.
  2. My damn coffee maker broke AGAIN….. If you know anything about me, this needs no further explanation.
  3. and so on and so on…. basically my whole “routine is down the drain”

To “get through” the week, I have held on to the fact that today would be a “just chill” day.  When the alarm went off at 5:00 am, I smiled when I shut it off and tossed the phone.  I went back to sleep.  I won’t call it “Restful” though, because when I am dreaming I work out a lot of things that have been stressing me out.  Either way, when I did FINALLY get out of bed at 8:00 this morning, my ” precoffee” thoughts were….UGH, some days “I hate people”…..smh

As I walked into the kitchen to turn on the coffee maker, I remembered a song I used to listen to.  You guessed it… “I hate people”, by Theory of a Deadman.  I opened up Youtube, typed the song in search and hit play.  I hit the button on the coffee maker, and let the dogs out.  When I came back into the room the song had finished playing and I had missed it, so I typed it in again. But then I had to leave the room to pee.  When I came back the song had finished again.

Is the Third Time a charm?

THIS TIME, I grabbed my coffee, sat in front of the computer and typed it in again… “I hate my life”….As I took my first sip of coffee and youtube reloaded. This is what I saw….i hate my life

and the COFFEE WENT EVERYWHERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Seriously?!?!?!?  I type “I hate my life” and INSTANTLY I am spammed with suicide prevention ads?!??!…..Start sending me coffee maker ads or how to receive your coffee in an iv form!!!!  I instantly ” look around” (searching for a hidden camera)  Seriously?!?!? I guess I said that before, but one more time…SERIOUSLY?!?!?!?

Enough of this spying on people Big brother shit!!!! 

THAT is what I am writing about now

Does the U.S. Constitution give you the right to privacy?

The answer is NO!…. funny for some reason I thought it did.  OH shit, more overthinking…..and lots of reading and googling etc…..smh

I have given in to the whole tradeoff thing…. Convenience vs. Privacy to save money on gas when I signed up for a “discount” card at the super market.

I also use google maps quite frequently to navigate.  I have only just recently, by accident learned that google tracks ALL of your activity.  Google knows where your cell phone is at any given time day or night.  WTF?!?!  and the sad thing is I am sure I surrendered my right to privacy when I agreed to let them “help me with directions”….smh

The biggest battle I am having right now is with Einstein’s purchase of Alexa.  I was in the kitchen the other day and mentioned maybe trying a new recipe for Meatloaf.  (Alexa is NOT allowed in my kitchen).  When I went back into the adjacent room a few hours later to “check” facebook, my news feed was loaded with recipes for Meatloaf.  Enough already!!!!!!

When you buy a smart tv, if you don’t UNCLICK the button to turn off voice activation, you are allowing them to record 24/7..

I know that I probably sound like a paranoid freak, and that no one really wants to know that much about what I do, but I personally think I need to rethink the whole convenience vs privacy thing. I am going to spend more time researching “how to live off the grid”  Is there such a thing as privacy?

In the meantime, while I am still using the internet…let me throw you a bone big brother…  I would like to be the first to know

  1. When coffee comes in IV form and how to get it?
  2. Where Coors Light is on sale?  Because I am going to start drinking.
  3. Is privacy even real?

On that note, does anyone have any thoughts to share, want to have a debate with me?  Maybe even a beer….I’m “buying”.

What are your thoughts?

 

My “Dirty Little Secret”…..

I CAN’T KEEP MY COFFEE CUPS FROM LOOKING LIKE THIS EVERY WEEK!!!!

(So not what you were expecting though huh?) 😉

But while you are here, can you help?

I’m serious!!! The first step in getting help is ADMITTING you have a problem.

I have a major problem!!!!  Not only with dirty coffee cups, but with coffee in general, I am an addict.  But let’s start with the smaller of the problems….. my coffee cups.  This is disgusting!  The sad thing is, the cup just came out of the dishwasher.  (maybe I need a new dishwasher?!??!) That would incredibly suck because, just this morning…..

Another one bites the dustanother one bites the dust

This is my second coffee pot funeral this month!!!!

Each day, I rinse my coffee cup out with warm water, and load it into the dishwasher.  (On the average, the dishwasher is run every other day).  After a week or so though, my cups look like this.  I don’t understand how that’s even possible.

About one month ago, Einstein told me I was “doing it all wrong”, and to prove this, he filled all of our coffee cups up with hot water, and let them soak in the sink for a couple days (periodically refreshing the hot water).  YES I was mad that I couldn’t use the sink for 2 days, OCD remember? BUT, after spending over an hour scrubbing them out with vinegar, baking soda, AND a toothbrush the month before, I was more than willing to let him SHOW ME “what I was doing wrong”.  (I did take pictures of him doing it his way, and I do believe he used more elbow grease than he let on, but either way the cups came clean….. FOR A WEEK!!!!!!)

Fast Forward to THIS MORNING.  Not only could I not find a CLEAN cup, but another coffee maker bit the dust.  😦  I really wish someone delivered coffee in my neighborhood since I shouldn’t be allowed to drive, let alone SPEAK, until I have at LEAST a cup, but no such luck.   So now, here I sit with freshly scrubbed coffee cups, and no coffee maker.  cups are cleanI have ordered yet another new one from Amazon, though in reality I will run to Walmart and buy a ‘spare’ within the next hour. (Starbucks made a killing from me this morning)

But how do I keep my coffee cups from looking like that?!?!?!?  Any help, tips, etc would be most appreciated!!!!!!!  Ok tips like “stop drinking coffee” or “don’t make it so strong” will be considered offensive and I may have to kill you…only real help please.

coffee pic

 

 

 

Feel the Fear and DO IT ANYWAY!!!!

Two months ago, I decided to start a blog…this entire post is about my experiences in the last two months as I have challenged myself to step out of my comfort zone.  (kind of like a roller coaster ride)

Today’s personal challenge was to make an unedited video and post it.  TBH,  I have been thinking about it for about a month now, and talking myself out of it for one reason or another……. but I finally jumped and did it.

Before you watch the video, if you choose to, let me again state that there is no real point to the video, except that I needed to challenge myself to do something I was afraid of and I did it and it didn’t kill me…..YET.… my stomach is still in knots….

I began my blog/ website (whatever the technical term is about 2 months ago.)  I originally had thoughts about writing about Multiple Sclerosis, but what did I want to write about?  That it sucks?  Yes it does!  Ok, so not that….

How do you make the most of your life in spite of having MS?   Better…maybe.   So I decided to start there.  Please keep in mind, I also just jumped into the blog thing.  I had never heard of wordpress, and while I have taken a couple classes in html programming, I have never put my knowledge into practice.  I created an account on wordpress.com, paid $8.00 a month upfront for a year and then my mind went completely blank.  Oh shit now what?  This was my first blog post. 

I laughed so hard that day.  I was proud of myself for FINALLY taking that first step.  It just felt good.  I  spent the next couple of weeks writing SOMETHING almost everyday, but I could never focus on just one subject, some posts were about MS, some were technology struggles as I continued to dig into blogging concepts, some were just random rants about life.

After being in the blogging world for about a month, I realized that what I was actually trying to do is to Put myself out there, and to connect with other people.  I have enjoyed chatting with other bloggers and hearing their struggles.  I have met other people that are living with autoimmune disorders and chronic illnesses, and learned how they deal with life on a day to day basis.  I’ve made new friendships with “millennials”, and I have learned alot about myself in the process.  Most importantly, I have learned that I want to learn everything about everything, and I need to slow down a bit.

I still don’t have a topic to blog about, or a niche, other than reaching out to people, talking about my life, and learning about others.  If any of that sounds cool to you, say hello, let’s talk and get to know each other.  I’ve put myself out there, as scary as it was, so now it’s your turn.  I don’t mean hey let’s talk on the phone everyday or anything, but I mean let’s talk…really talk about any and everything….ok well maybe not anything, but maybe you get my point…..

Ok so now for the infamous, Link to COMPLETELY POINTLESS FIRST VIDEO

Again, posting this was a personal challenge for me.  I can already think of 5,000 things I could have or should have done.  But there it is…..