I’m in a Hurry (and don’t know why)

I was talking with a friend the other day, and commented that I didn’t know how I had “made it” to 45.  She responded saying, “no shit, I don’t know how YOU did it either”.  (note she didn’t say WE, she said ME) That’s kind of sad don’t you think?  I mean, I have never fought in a war, saved someone from a burning building, or performed any other heroic act.  Yet, for most of my life I have lived in a constant state of fight or flight.  I have always raced to the next bullet point.  There was always something else that NEEDED to be done.

Have you ever heard the song, I’m in a Hurry by Alabama?  I swear they wrote it for me.

I’m tired.  I really am tired.

The thing is, I’m not done.  Far from it.  But I am learning that if I continue at the speed I have been going my whole life, I am going to burn out….quickly.

I have pretty much lived my life by this quote,

“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming “Wow! What a Ride!”

Hunter S. Thompson,

While I do still believe this, maybe I don’t have to be in such a hurry to get there?

Being pretty immobile for the last month, while waiting for my foot to heal, has been a blessing in disguise. As I said before, Patience has never been my strong suit, but for my foot to heal successfully I needed to practice some.  I have spent my “downtime” looking for OTHER ways I could heal and become stronger as well.

On the physical side I am going to start with physical therapy.  That’s it.  No big get out there and  walk a mile a day again.  Baby steps.

I have also been reading and researching various diet or lifestyle changes.  Although I do hope to lose weight, my goal is more to reduce the inflammation in my body to see if I can reduce the number of medications I take.

On the Mental Side, not only did I reread all my posts from this last year but, I also took the time to relive the excitement of my daughter’s wedding.  I allowed myself time to dream about all the things I want to do with my future grandchildren.  Most importantly, though I finally allowed myself to grieve all of the tragedies of last year.  This isn’t to say I am done grieving, more that I have slowed down enough to let myself feel the pain, I had been running from.

It’s kind of cool that even though I thought recovery time from surgery was going to be unbearable and a bunch of lost time I would have to make up for, instead it forced me to pace myself, and I was still very productive.

I’m a work in progress! 🙂

S L O W L Y

but getting stronger every day!

 

 

 

9 thoughts on “I’m in a Hurry (and don’t know why)

  1. There’s always a reason to stick around. I think I speak for many when I say that the world is a better place with your wacky presence. So keep being patient, slow it down the best you can and here’s to another 45

    Liked by 3 people

  2. My friend told me once that I was born to run…true story. I have spent so much of my life racing to some “finish” line, or in reality, the “start” line. Always thinking my life will start once I hit this milestone. Truth is my life started 41 years ago. I too am learning to slow it down and enjoy the journey. So here’s to us, slowing down and hitting the gas pedal every now and then 😉

    Liked by 3 people

  3. My brothers and I often talk about how it’s a miracle we survived our childhood, and I am always amazed I made it through my younger adult life, so you’re not alone Grace.😊My best friend told me once that I’m always ready to start the “next thing,” and that’s true to some extent. I’m finally learning to slow down and enjoy each day as it comes, but it sure doesn’t come naturally to me.

    Like

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