No Pole Dancing Here

As I begin to write, I’m stuck on a name for this post.  Officially it should be No Good Deed Goes Unpunished Part II, click here for part one ,but as I am thinking about how my “I only have ONE doctor today, so I am going to spend the rest of the day relaxing day”, turned into time at the Village Hall, a police report and a call from my State representative’s office regarding that damn utility pole issue, I am at a loss for what to call this post.  Mi vida loca? Don’t visit your daughter’s house?  Keep Walking Grace etc etc.  Oh and I should probably mention that in all that chaos, I never even made it to the doctor’s office.  I forgot to call which is so uncharacteristic for me they called me three times to see if I was ok…..SMH

So yesterday morning, as I was having my coffee, fantasizing about my relaxing day, I remembered that my daughter had an important meeting that afternoon.  I thought to myself, “I should call and amp her up for this”.  I knew she was nervous about the meeting, and it might be helpful to try to boost her confidence.  Then I remembered who I was talking about, my kid?  she wasn’t out of bed yet.  If I called her, she was gonna to first yell at me for waking her up.  Next she was going to say “I KNOW MOTHER”. and so on and so on.

Ok Plan B.  I would instead call her neighbor (my old neighbor and walking buddy) to try to convince her to take a walk outside in our barely above freezing temperature weather with me.  (ANYTHING beats walking on the treadmill and you only live once right?)  Fortunately for me, she was game.  Ok maybe unfortunately for me, because this started the ball rolling.

I sent my kiddo a text explaining that I was going for a walk with “L” and that I was going to pop in while I was in town if that was ok.  Surprisingly she responded OK, (better than K or FINE MOTHER) and I headed out the door.  I parked in my old driveway, headed over to L’s and we started to walk.  While walking we played the “quick tell me everything that has happened in your life in the past 3 weeks game”.  ( I really have to work on keeping in touch better)  Finally the conversation turned to Frontier.  She explained to me that she had called the utility company 4 different times and they had sent out 4 different people to “access” the situation.  Each time a new person came, they brought a bigger truck, but no one actually did anything. HUH? WTF?!?!?  When she was done telling me about all the calls, and looked at me with pleading eyes, I blurted out…. “Do you want me to take a turn, or carry the ‘ball’ for a little bit?”

L was MORE THAN EAGER to hand me pages of notes, ticket numbers etc.  We finished our walk, I wished her well on the road trip she was taking that day, said hello to my kiddo, gave her a quick but unnecessary pep talk, grabbed my phone to take some pictures and headed out the door.

As I walked around the house, trying not to trip on the wire that was hanging down, this is what I saw……pic 2 As I got closer, I realized the wire on the right seemed to be the only thing holding the pole up….. um that wire is connected to MY HOUSE.  MY house is holding up the pole?!?!?!? UN NO!!!  (my house, my daughters house same difference… long story for another rant)

pulling off my soffitNow I was pissed!  Seriously?!?!??! While Frontier was out doing “nothing” they couldn’t have at least cut the phone line so it wasn’t damaging my house?!?!?  I was going to call them right then and there but hey guess what….only 16% battery left on my phone…..argh.   (I had a brief thought that I should get a landline since my cell phone battery is always dead, but I assure you it would never be from Frontier)  Instead, I would go home, charge my phone for a bit and call frontier from my couch.

As I left my old house, I had to drive by the Village Hall….hmmm wth…”maybe they thought I was exaggerating when I had originally called about the line?”  I decided to stop in and show them pictures.  Yah Yvonne was working again, and she did remember my original call to their office.  I insisted that she look at the pictures on my phone before my battery died.  When she saw them, she admitted that it was worse that she had imagined and was surprised as hell that no one had done anything.  She asked me to email her the pics and she would see if she could help.

I put my phone on the charger while I was driving home.  (I finally had enough battery to email the pictures but probably not enough yet to fight with Frontier)…… As I sat watching the phone waiting for it to charge ( yes the whole watched pot thing) , it occurred to me that someone was going to have to fix my soffit.  I wasn’t climbing on a ladder again to do it.  Shit this probably meant a homeowner’s claim etc etc. Which would probably mean a police report needed to be filed……OMG!!!!  So much for the relaxing day.

I called the non emergency number for the sheriff, where the operator advised me that yes I should file a report, but I would have to be at my/ my kiddo’s house to do it.  Fine Fine…back in the car…. I let my daughter know the police would be coming and what I had transpired. (she wasn’t suprised)  I let my old neighbor know I would be coming back by if she wanted to add anything to the report.  ( she just laughed and laughed)… Ok well I volunteered right?

When the officer arrived and we were walking around the side of the house, he literally pulled me back to keep me away from a possible live wire.  I couldn’t resist, and reached out and grabbed the phone line, telling him “don’t worry it’s JUST A phone line.”  The look on his face…. PRICELESS.… but I digress….

The officer accessed the damage and identified all of the utility lines and then informed me he couldn’t take a report for property damage because there was no criminal intent…… You have got to be kidding me?!?!?!??! 

What about negligence and and and?!?!?  When I stopped ranting I realized he was just standing there smiling at me.  He couldn’t officially file a ‘property damage’ report, but he COULD and WOULD be contacting Frontier himself insisting that this was a hazard and they needed to come out immediately.  (ok ok touche, he got me back for grabbing the line)

The officer sat in my driveway making his phone calls. ( I guess snuff is pretty scary looking, especially when I am stressed)  He gave me a ticket number, follow up phone numbers, and his word that someone should be out soon, since he had declared it an emergency.

I still had an hour before I had to pick Einstein up from work, so I chatted with my daughter’s boyfriend for a bit, and then received what I thought was a telemarketing call from IL Representative so and so’s office telling me that the Village had filed a claim against Frontier and that they would be stepping in to handle this.

SHOCKED EXPRESSION PICTURE HERE!!!!  (I’m sorry I am really to tired to search for one), but I will update this when I’m feeling better.

I think I am still kind of shocked.  I never expected this to get this big.  Seriously?!? Someone finally heard me?!?!?  It’s only been a month!!!!! snarl grrrr etc.  But someone who could actually get something done was getting involved?!?!?!?  Wow! Awesome!!!

I drove home feeling ecstatic.  (Ok exhausted but ecstatic too.)  I had the best intentions of writing an incredible blog post, about another adventure and the fact that there are good people in the world, and the squeaky wheel…something or other, and and and….. but I crashed….. I fricking hate slump week!!!!!  Oh well there was always tomorrow right?

So today is “tomorrow”.  My old neighbor said the pole still looks the same, but the State Representative’s office called to tell me, that it would be resolved today.  She really is a great lady.  She made sure I had her email, phone number, alternate number etc.  It still surprises the hell out of me when a complete stranger goes the extra mile just because.  Over the next week, I will have to write a Thank you letter to her, because she was so helpful, but for now I wait.  We shall see.  Now I am all done writing and I still don’t have a title for this post…..Any suggestions?  Please?

The Morning After….”THE VIDEO”

Yesterday, I posted a video I did as a self challenge to put myself out there and face something I was terrified of.  I didn’t watch the video again until today and this morning “Pre-coffee” I made another one after I finished watching the first one.

For anyone wondering “Pre-coffee” should have a clinical definition and be categorized as some other kind of disease.  ( At least for me it is)  I am not a doctor, so I won’t attempt a clinical definition….. but picture this….

Or check out other pins I have collected .  If you have any to share, please add them too!!…But I digress….I wanted to share some things I have learned both about myself, and about making a video, just from doing that ONE VIDEO….. Caution though…the following video was made PRE-COFFEE. (ok while having the first cup or I wouldn’t have been able to turn on my computer)  But as usual I digress…

Here is my second video if you want to see

Other things I learned from making the video:

  1.  How to upload a video
  2. I really DO NOT Enunciate ( which is why I attempted to add captions) to this one… not perfect, it’s alot of work, but yah I learned something new.
  3. I HATE  the way I LOOK and SOUND precoffee
  4. My goofy first video encouraged someone that I consider a VERY SUCCESSFUL blogger to try something she has been putting off…. DOUBLE WIN!!!!
  5. I’m gonna keep “doing me”.  I know that If I did this or that when making a video, it would be more successful, but baby steps for now.
  6. Drink coffee before EVER attempting to blog or video

Ok Now I’m just rambling…. Thank you again to everyone that is following me on this adventure!!!! I am really enjoying it and learning lots of new things!!!!!

 

 

 

 

No Good Deed goes Unpunished

ONE OF THESE DAYS….. yeah right…. I would like to think that ONE OF THESE DAYS I will learn to just walk away….. but on December 7th of this year I didn’t…..

For the record, today is December 17, 2017, and the issue is still causing me a slight headache.

What happened

I went to my daughter’s house to pick up my dogs, and noticed a very large black utility cable hanging down from her neighbor’s house onto the ground.  Keep walking Grace, just keep walking….. but NO! I decide to follow the cable and realize a utility pole in my daughter’s back yard is now at a 60? degree angle instead of the  90 degree angle it should be…. hmmm why didn’t I just keep walking?!?!?  Visions of injured children, “sue- happy” citizens, and a possible fire hazard all flashed through my brain…..FUCK!

I knocked on the neighbors door, no one home.  My daughter wasn’t home (which was why I was picking up the dogs)….. Ok ok, I can call someone,… but who do you call?  I had 32% battery onmy phone, so let’s hope I pick the right place.  Not an actual emergency, so not the police.  I don’t know what kind of line it is…gas, electric, cable, and I’m sure as hell not gonna touch it to find out, so I decide on the Village.  I google the phone number for the village and spoke with a woman named Yvonne.  I explained I was at my daughter’s house and noticed that the pole was falling and that there was some kind of line on the ground and that maybe they wanted to call someone and let them know.  She insisted that I needed to call Com Ed (the electric company) and let them know……

Why did I need to call?  This wasn’t my house.

What if it isn’t an electric line?

Couldn’t they send someone out to investigate?

She responded that Com Ed handled all utility line reports, so I needed to call them.

I hung up shaking my head (already knowing that I would need to cancel my plans for the rest of the afternoon) because this was gonna be a long one……

I called Com Ed, and was disconnected 3 times for pressing the incorrect choices on the automated system ( apparently if you don’t want new service, don’t have a current account number, and don’t want to speak spanish, they don’t want to help you) before I reached a live person.  (Well they were speaking, so I assumed they were alive, but after our call I do question whether there was an actual heartbeat or brain activity there.) I was advised that they would send someone out sometime to check it out.  SOMEONE? SOMETIME?!?!?  Seriously?!?!? Someone could get hurt, or again in this “sue happy” country…SUED.  How about you send someone now?

cable downFine Fine, I will check it out myself!  I went back out to see if I could determine what type of utility line it was.  I followed the line to the neighbor’s house and concluded that it LOOKED like MAYBE it was a phone line???? (I still wasn’t going to touch it)  I had no idea what company handled land line service since I haven’t had one in years, back to google….Yeah my phone didn’t like that……. 19% battery left. UGH!

Now a call to Frontier.  I don’t even remember how many times I was disconnected before getting a live person this time, or how long it took me to explain who I was and why I was calling.  DOES IT REALLY MATTER WHO THE HELL I AM?  I am a good person, trying to do a good thing.  After literally an hour of being transferred from one department to the next, they finally said that they would send someone out.  As they were giving me the reference number my phone turned off.  You have got to be kidding me!!!!!! 0% battery!   SMH…. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath….well I tried.  I think it is more than most people would have done, and have since learned why.

I went to go back into my daughter’s house to get the dogs, only to realize that my keys were locked inside.  It’s winter in Illinois and most of the neighbors have gone south for the season.  Now what?!?!?  It would be kind of pointless to try to walk to call someone since I don’t actually know anyone’s phone numbers, (they are all stored in my currently dead phone). and God forbid I fell on the way.  So I sat and waited.  Waited for my daughter’s boyfriend to get home and let me back in…..

During those 3 hours I repeated….Mind your own business Grace, just keep walking Grace…. but I know that I won’t.  It’s who I am.  I care, I get involved.  Even telling myself that “No Good Deed Goes Unpunished” won’t stop me.  I will still take off my coat for someone that is cold, even if I am freezing.  I will continue taking in stray animals, even though I already own 5.  I have thought that maybe I am a masochist…maybe I am?  Either way I am who I am.

I went home on the 7th feeling that at least I tried.  No one had shown up while I was there.  I WASTED? 4 hours of my life, and it is still not fixed.  The pole is still leaning, the cable is still on the ground, but I tried.  There is a little bright orange traffic cone on the cable where it meets the ground, for all the good it will do.safety cone

A fellow blogger reached out to me to say “Hi” today, (I assume because I haven’t been writing lately) and it gave me a push to do a brain dump again.  THANK YOU “you who shall remain nameless at the moment”!!!

I have been trying to work up the courage to do a “live video” of some sort to introduce myself, so I haven’t been writing much while I am learning about Facebook live and youtube.  My goal is to do some sort of “Hi, this is me” video this week.  I have so many questions that I would like to ask fellow bloggers that I follow , maybe you have wondered the same things about me?

 

One Breath at a time

A couple hours ago, a familiar name popped up on my cell phone.  I debated about answering the phone because I had so many things I needed to do, and I knew I would get lost in conversation and end up not finishing what I was working on.  Oh what the hell, I would just pick up real quick and tell him that we had to catch up later because I was busy.

I answered the phone expecting my friend to say “Hello Doll”, (which is what he usually says to me in his super sexy southern drawl.) but instead I heard a sniffle, a cough, and a sharp intake of breath.  I questioned, “Ghost? (his nickname) Ghost are you ok?  What’s going on?”  Another sniffle, followed by, “No maam, this is his son, Levy.”…. OH FUCK!  My mind thought NO! NO! NO! NO!!  That’s about all I remember exactly.  Levy was calling to tell me that his daddy had a stroke a week ago.

It’s amazing that when you get news like that literally hundreds of thoughts, questions, memories hit you at once.  I had images of the first time we had met face to face running through my head.  (We met through an online game that we had played together for 4 years hence the nickname Ghost.  Mine was Milano, but my friend’s called me “Millie”.)  I remembered the first time I heard his voice in real life, the hours of game play which turned into an incredible friendship, and so on and so on.

Then there was a voice through the fog…. “Milano, Millie, Maam…are you  still there?”

“Oh shit, um yes yes I’m still here.”

More sniffles followed by, “Okay, maam, my daddy wanted me to let you know that he had a stroke a week ago, but he is doing ok, well he will be ok, I mean he is alive”…….

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Levy went on to try to explain that Ghost couldn’t talk… no not that he couldn’t talk, but that he couldn’t find the right words, or they just wouldn’t come out right.  The poor kid was having trouble explaining what was happening because he didn’t understand what was happening himself.  Hell I didn’t understand what was happening.  I could hear Ghost in the background trying to say my name.  Trying to help Levy explain, but he was getting angry that Millie kept coming out Molly, and he couldn’t make a sentence.

Somehow I was on the phone with Ghost, well kind of he was trying to talk, I was trying to understand, but then there were tears, so many tears…and they wouldn’t stop.  I tried to tell Ghost that I was here for him.  I would make the drive to Florida if his family needed me to.  I told him I loved him and and and…. Then I was on the phone with his son again.  I tried to tell him the same things I told Ghost.  If they needed help, I could and would be there.  There were just so many tears.  In hindsight, poor kid probably thought “Oh no, I can’t handle you too”.

When I hung up the phone, I tried to make the calls to our other mutual friends letting them know why they hadn’t heard from Ghost, and to let them know he would be okay.  The problem is, I didn’t know, …….I don’t know that he will be ok  and again so many tears.

When I reached the “Elder” of our little group, he tried to put me at ease by explaining that this was common when someone had a stroke.  It didn’t mean that he would permanently suffer, he reminded me that Ghost “IS A STUBBORN OLD COOT”….although he is only 55, he is pretty damn stubborn.  I listened and cried for the next hour.

I am absolutely exhausted emotionally and physically.  I am not going to jump in my car and make the 15 hour drive to Florida… yet.  I am not going to drink the whole case of beer sitting in my refrigerator. (although I had envisioned doing just that)  I am going to stop beating myself up that I didn’t call him last week when I saw the rocks that made me think of him.  I decided instead to come here, and to write this.

We have all heard the sayings or cliches that you should always tell the people you care about that you care about them.  You never know if there will be a tomorrow to tell someone.  Slow down and enjoy life etc etc etc.  Instead of just telling you those things, I am trying to tell you WHY I am telling you those things.  Please take a minute and give your parents a call, give your kids an extra hug?  Don’t be in such a hurry, and take today ONE BREATH AT A TIME.

The story with the Rocks is that over the years I have collected numerous things from people that have “touched me” or left a big impression.  I’m not materialistic, it’s more something to hold onto when you are missing them, or a reminder that they are there.  When I was at Ghost’s house, I asked if I could take these rocks from his patio that he designed.  They were extras, but they reminded me of his characteristics….strong, hardworking creative etc.  They are sitting on my deck as I haven’t figure out if I should add them to my rock garden, or my china cabinet with other things I have collected.  I saw them last week and thought I should send him a picture to let him know I still had those silly rocks….but I got too busy.  😦

 

 

Why isn’t there a universal “I’m sorry” sign or symbol?

Earlier today I started to back out in front of someone.  Thankfully, I looked again before I continued and she was paying enough attention to catch me backing out before she hit me.  She stopped her car, I continued to back out, and I tried to tell her that I was sorry from my car, but I didn’t know how.  As I put my hands up, they didn’t know what to do.  I mouthed the words, “I’m sorry” as I put one hand over my heart and shook my head.  She nodded at me and parked in the spot that I had previously occupied and I drove away.

For the entire day I have been plagued with the question…

“Why isn’t there a universal sign to tell someone that you are sorry?”

I don’t know of a single individual, that doesn’t recognize the “Middle Finger” as a sign of Fuck you, you are an idiot etc…so why isn’t there a sign that says I’m sorry?!?!?fuck you

As a society are we that accustomed to negativity and blame that we know how to “tell someone off”, but we don’t know how to apologize?  Is it bigger than that?  Do we not know how to accept responsibility for our own shortcomings?

I spent almost an hour on google trying to find a “universal sign” for I’m sorry.  The closest thing I could find was the ASL or American Sign Language, and again that is not universal, and from any kind of distance would appear that I was giving the middle finger.

What would you do in a situation like that?  How do you convey that YOU SCREWED UP, when another driver can’t clearly see your facial expressions or hear your voice?  I had even thought of pulling over and getting out of my car to apologize, but in the city I live in you DON’T just walk up to someone’s car and not expect to get shot.

I’m sure I will go back to my busy life soon, and “forget” this incident, but I still wonder…. “Why isn’t there a sign for apologies?!?!?”