On second thought….

About a week ago, I wrote a post called “saying goodbye“. My credit card was billed $94.00 for a word press subscription that I wasn’t using, so I figured it was a good time to cancel. After posting said post, several of the friends I have made on WP advised me that WP had free version and I would only need to pay $18.00 a year to keep my domain name msgracefulnot.com. Hmmm ok that I could do, so I took down the Saying goodbye post, cancelled the paid subscription, and here I am.

Thank you again to those of you that reached out to me!!!!!

Why I stopped using Word press

For the greater part of last year, I made the conscious choice to avoid social media as much as possible. My personal plate was full and I couldn’t deal with all the negativity, fear, and hate being passed around between people. I saw sides of people that I could not imagine they were capable of, so after writing, Say what you mean, and mean what you say, I pretty much “disappeared.”

When I created my blog, my original intention was to provide PROOF that with the right amount of determination, creativity, and humor you can survive almost anything.  I wanted to help anyone that was feeling alone or overwhelmed with their lives, to see that they were not alone.  I believe that on many occasions I did that.

  1. I have written about  being diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. 
  2. I’ve written about choosing a disease modifying therapy.
  3. I’ve written about how insurance companies like to “play doctor”.
  4. I’ve written about my children and not winning the mother of the year award.
  5. I’ve talked about air travel with MS.
  6. I’ve talked about Train travel in a wheelchair.  and the importance of knowing your equipment and your limits.
  7. I’ve talked about being full of shit.
  8. I’ve shared some of the treatments for bladder incontinence and urge incontinence due to MS.
  9. I’ve shared some of my most painful moments.  (Mentally and physically)
  10. I’ve shared some of my happiest moments.

I mentioned earlier that I’ve had a full plate this year, but I’ve not been at all specific. There are multiple reasons for this.

In some instances, the stories I want to share, are not entirely mine to tell. For example, both of my parents are going through life changing medical issues. I can tell you how it’s been affecting me, but I’m not sure how much is TOO much to share. I’m still working on this.

Another reason for the vagueness is because the “jury is still out” about many of my health issues. While I can share what I have been experiencing, and why I’ve been doing what I have been doing, I still don’t know if my decisions were the right ones to make, so I don’t want to lead anyone astray if they are dealing with anything similar. I will work on this as well.

In the meantime, I would like to reintroduce myself, and invite you back into my world. If you are joining me for the first time, my About Me page, is a good place to start. (I wrote it a year ago, but I believe most things still apply.)

When I thought I was leaving wordpress, I was trying to think of a way to “go out with a bang.” I began creating a “contest” to attempt to draw everyone in, one more time. It has occurred to me, that I can use the same contest to “Come in with a bang”, or “get back in the saddle if you will.” Giving away prizes, opens the door to discussing some of the positive things that I have been doing over the last year as well.

On Wednesday, September 2nd at 9 am Central Time, I will post a list of questions about myself, or things I have written about in this blog. I do believe that most of the questions can be answered by reading the posts that I have linked above. (if not THESE posts specifically, the answers will still be available within my website) The prizes will go to the first two people that post the most correct answers to my questions in the post “How graceful are you?” in the comments section of that post no earlier than Monday September 7th @ 9 am central time and no later than 3 pm Central time of the same day.

I hope you will all participate. See you soon!

Say what you mean, and mean what you say

Here’s a novel idea…. Say what you mean and mean what you say.  Don’t have anything nice to say?  How about don’t say anything at all?

I am so tired of all the anger, meanness, and blame that some people are spreading in the world today.  I understand that fear and pain can bring out the worst in people, however that is NOT an acceptable reason to be cruel.

“But he/she did it first”?!?!?  What are you five?!?!  “Well everyone else was doing it!!!”  Ever hear the story about jumping off a bridge?  While I think my parents are incredible people, they are mere mortals, yet somehow they made sure I learned that two wrongs don’t make a right, and jumping off bridges because friends did it are NOT very good behaviors to practice.

Many people hide behind this “invisible shield” when they post things online.  They suddenly develop “balls of steel”.  Why is that ok?  And the name calling?!?!?  Seriously?!?!?

Because several states/countries that have been experiencing some form of “lockdown” due to Covid-19, are thinking about “reopening” or limiting restrictions that were placed on their citizens this week several people have been attempting to discuss their state or countries decisions.  I personally have been asked my opinion no less than 20 times.  Regardless of the specific question asked, my reply always includes the statement, “I am not afraid of getting the virus, (If it happens it happens) however, PEOPLE AND THEIR ACTIONS are scaring the hell out of me.

For the past 5 months, I have had a somewhat different (imo stricter) set of  restrictions placed on myself than most people have in the United States.  I have been mostly ‘confined’ to a wheelchair.  I couldn’t simply go for a walk.  I couldn’t drive myself to get groceries, or something that someone else cooked for me.  My outdoor excursions have consisted of visiting my doctor’s office, or the hospital for things that could not be completed online or over the phone. I bring my own restrictions up because I can honestly say I have not been an asshole to anyone.  I have not posted one cruel or hateful thing to anyone, but by the standards being accepted in society I would be ok if I did?!?!?  I don’t get it!

Yes I have felt alone and sometimes depressed, but NOW I am getting scared.  Scared that I am starting to dislike a lot of people.  Scared that if left to their own devices people will destroy themselves.  But mostly I am scared that I have started to believe that I will start handing people the rope.  (give “them” enough rope and they will hang themselves)  Isn’t that terrible?  I don’t want to become one of THOSE people.  (The ones that I am complaining about)

I strongly believe that you should practice what you preach, so I have been “quiet”.  I have been avoiding social media.

Maybe I have been “quiet” too long?

If you are not part of the solution, do NOT be part of the problem.

 

 

 

Check out my New Implants!!!

OMG Grace! Is that ALL you do….. talk about your foot?

Well that’s not ALL that I talk about, but since there is not much that I can do without it  affecting me, yes I talk about my foot A LOT.  And my wheelchair, but I have that because of my foot, so I guess it’s about the same huh?

I promise to write about something other than my foot soon, but first I would like to share some updates for anyone that is interested.

0402201617First of all, I have now been casted in every different color material available.  Who would have thought that something like that would go on my list of “achievements”?!?!?0402201529

Secondly,  while there is still no end in sight about the amount of time I will be non- weight bearing and in a cast, the incisions appear to be healing well and I am no longer in much pain.

0422201927Third, while I swear I have not put any weight on my right foot, I can’t say that I haven’t been a bit self destructive during my recovery. Not only did I have a bit of an obsession with tearing apart one of my casts, but I also attempted to go down two stairs by myself and ended up being launched from the wheelchair.  Thankfully, the doctor said the x-rays showed the only damage I did was to my pride.  Yay for me!!!!

Thank you for taking the time to stop by today.  If you have a few more minutes, would you mind sharing your longest to recover from injury?  Did you follow doctor’s orders? I look forward to hearing from you!

 

 

 

 

 

A Dog’s Purpose

Superman, recommended this movie a long time ago, but I “bookmarked” it fearing I would cry too much especially after having just lost my best friend snuff. I watched it tonight, and I did cry alot, but I also laughed and loved alot… I Definitely have to recommend A dog’s journey. If you don’t believe me, read Supermans post 🙂

Billy Mac's avatarThe Tao of Bill

The other night, while strolling through the 179 channels of nothing that we pay too much for, I came across the movie A Dogs Purpose. I’d heard of it, in particular, that it was sad. I’ve wanted to watch it but I learned my lesson with Marley and Me after I barely recovered from the ending of Old Yeller some 45 years ago.

An aside, I can watch the worst horror movie jam packed with gratuitous sex, entrails hanging from the rafters and enough blood to fill a swimming pool and I will sit, unflinching as I munch popcorn. There is no limit to the depravity I can view and call it entertainment. But I lose my mind if an animal is harmed, especially a dog.

Curiosity prevailed and I selected it and sat back in my recliner. An hour and a half later I sat transfixed as the credits…

View original post 1,367 more words

Wheelchairs are NOT the enemy?!?!

Over the years, my views on wheelchairs have run the full gamut.  When I was a little kid, they looked SO cool and were FUN to play in/with.  (Wheelchair races, wheelies, etc)  As I got older, and was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis, the threat of being confined to a wheelchair terrorized me.  The keywords here are THREAT and CONFINED.  All I could focus on were the things I wouldn’t be able to do, instead of the additional things that using a wheelchair could help me do.

I’m not saying that I am excited about being in a wheelchair AGAIN, or that you should rush out and buy one, but after having to use a wheelchair many times over the last 20 years, I can FINALLY acknowledge that in some ways it makes my life easier.

Some examples include:

  1.  Airports-  Using a wheelchair allows me to continue traveling.  My legs have become so much weaker over the years that even a “quick run” to the grocery store wears me out and makes falling more likely.   The long lines and distances at the airports would make it very difficult if not impossible for me to fly.  I have written numerous times about traveling in a wheelchair via plane and train.  Air Travel with MS- Use the tools available, Just the Facts Please, and Your mission should you choose to accept it are a couple examples if you are looking for more information.
  2. The Risk of falling is minimized-  I can’t say that the risk is eliminated, (Have you met, Grace?) but it is definitely smaller.  Full disclosure here-  I launched myself down the steps of my parents porch the other day because I got  impatient and was resisting the help that was offered.  😦
  3. I can move faster.  I’m not talking about using a power wheelchair, although you really can haul ass in those.  I’m talking about general everyday tasks.  I “roll” faster than most people can walk.  In the beginning, I didn’t have much in the way of endurance.  My arms got tired quickly. The more I push myself though, the stronger my arms are becoming, which in turn is making other “everyday tasks” easier to do.

Finally, and best of all….it allows me to hold and move with my twin grandsons.  Again, I don’t have the risk of falling with them.  I have an “auto rocking chair”, which they think it’s cool as hell.  When I am rolling around or backing up, I make noises like a race car or a construction vehicle backing up… Beep beep beep….

Thanks for reading along today.  What are your thoughts on the use of wheelchairs?  Can you think of any other way they can make your life easier?